[Student Example] Letter to Legislative Draft

You’re doing something powerful here: you’ve grounded your letter in a specific bill and your own experience as a student.

Here’s what I can tell you about Rep. Hoang Nguyen and what that might mean for HB0145:

• Rep. Hoang Nguyen is a Democratic member of the Utah House from Salt Lake City and has sponsored or supported several education- and student-related bills, like HB351 on school vision screening, which suggests sustained interest in student well-being and access to services (PolicyEngage, Utah HB351, 2026).
• In earlier debates about limiting diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts, she publicly described how those programs helped her own refugee family succeed, arguing that policy should expand—not restrict—opportunities for students from all backgrounds (Utah News Dispatch, 2024).
• More recently, she opposed a bill to tax certain money transfers abroad, warning that it would hurt immigrant and low-income families who rely on those funds for basics like food and medicine (KSL, 2026).
• HB0145 (School Excused Absence Amendments) is currently moving through the 2026 Utah Legislature, but as of now there isn’t public vote history or a recorded statement from Nguyen on this specific bill, so we can’t say for sure how she’ll vote (Utah Legislature, HB0145 status page, 2026).

• This is already a clear and respectful start that fits the formal civic audience your framework describes.
• You’ve done Part 1 really well: you say who you are, your school, the bill number/name, and your clear position, just like the guide recommends in “Part 1. Introduction (Establishing Ethos + Purpose)” from the (Framework for your legislative letter, n.d.).
• You’ve started Part 2 too: you explain why the issue matters beyond just you and what the bill changes, which lines up with “This issue is significant because ______. The proposed legislation ______ seeks to ______” from Part 2 in the same framework (Framework for your legislative letter, n.d.).
• One choice you might think about next is whether you want to add 1–2 concrete examples (a quick story, a statistic, or a scenario) so you’re also touching Part 3: “Evidence & Reasoning (Logos + Ethos)” in that framework (Framework for your legislative letter, n.d.).

• You’ve set up a clear, respectful request, so a likely first move from Rep. Moss would be to thank you for writing, mention your school by name, and acknowledge your concern about students’ mental and physical health.
• Because she has a history of supporting education and student‑focused policies in Utah, she might say she agrees that health and learning are connected and that schools should give students reasonable flexibility with excused absences (Utah State Legislature).
• She could then briefly explain what the current law allows, what HB0145 would change, and where that bill stands in the process (for example, whether it is in committee, awaiting a vote, or being revised) (Utah State Legislature).
• Finally, she might tell you whether she supports HB0145, describe any concerns (like how schools would track these absences), and invite you to keep in touch or even testify or attend a committee hearing as a student voice.

• Right now your letter already matches Part 1 and the start of Part 2 of the framework: you clearly say who you are, your connection to the district, the bill number, and your position, and you explain why the issue matters beyond just you ((“Framework for your legislative letter”)).
• As you keep drafting, you might choose one or two specific examples (a real sports event, competition, health appointment, or opportunity you or classmates have struggled to attend) to build a strong Part 3 “Evidence & Reasoning” paragraph with a clear claim → evidence → explanation → impact chain ((“Framework for your legislative letter”)).
• To anticipate Representative Hoang Nguyen’s response, you could look at how she has voted or spoken about student mental health, education, and attendance rules in past sessions and then ask yourself: “If she worries about abuse of excused absences or lower academic standards, how can I calmly show that this bill protects health without hurting learning?” ((Utah State Legislature)).
• When you write later paragraphs, you might directly name one or two likely concerns she could have (for example, tracking absences or accountability) and briefly answer them, which shows you’ve thought about both sides and strengthens your ethos and logos at the same time ((“Framework for your legislative letter”)).