american trial mock

My name is Hailey and I believe everyone deserves to be here in America , even though some people are a little worse than others, as in certain crimes that have been committed in our area causing it to be worse for others, race or not. But if we were speaking about race realistically some races create and commit more crimes and some are leading to the black american people

America is a great place for everyone. I don't think we should put people in jail based on skin color but based on others actions , as an example khalil. He was a drug dealer and he’s done crimes which were valid enough to be in prison, and it’s most common for that specific race to be caught in jail for doing those specific crimes as said though that proves this is from the bureau of jusie statistics, roughly over 60% of the prison population is black americans. , it’s not exactly being racist if it’s true, it’s been proven multiple times rather with facts or actions. Khalil didn't deserve to be shot, no so I'm not justifying the cop’s actions, but I am saying he wasn’t 100% wrong, while some cases where a black person reaches out their pocket, some innocent died from accusations but some also died with proof, as in their were cases found where they were armed and it was self defense, around Around 96% of people shot by police were armed with a weapon, with 87% of that percent being black people armed.

Mass incarceration is basically the high rate of imprisonment in the United States. It’s controversial because we are one of the highest places with the highest rate, which is impacting peo
ple of color, why? Maybe because they deserve it and the crimes they do. Again just proof. I do believe in human rights and everyone has a say in the world , some might say black people don’t deserve half of the imprisonment that happens to them, some say they do. I say actions always have consequences to their actions.

The united states helps us with our rights, the court system fights with our rights, protects us with our cases , they give us choices rather its a good or bad outcomes they make sure we have a say in what happens to us so we know we tried or that it wasn’t against our own will, but some cases aren't always the same, some are guilty and still try to fight against, they allow us to have our own say in certain situations, we have our own freedom of speech, and they make sure to protect us , as in cops for example, they keep us safe and they make sure we stay safe, its so much the united states have done for us, just some people might not agree because maybe their in the wrong.

General Document Comments 0

Mar 6

Student Amirah Williams smith's Question Student Amirah Williams smith and/or Thinking Partner (Mar 06 2026 2:26PM) : challenge my argument more

Thinking Partner with Student Amirah Williams smith's edits:

Your writing already puts a clear claim on the table: people go to prison mainly because of their own choices, and the system mostly works like it should.
One big challenge to your argument is that crime data and prison data don’t always line up—Black and white people use and sell drugs at similar rates, but Black people are much more likely to be arrested and jailed for it ((American Civil Liberties Union, “The War on Marijuana in Black and White,” 2013)).
Another challenge is that cops’ “reflexes” are shaped by bias: studies show officers are quicker to see Black people as threats and more likely to use force even when behavior is the same ((American Psychological Association, “Understanding Implicit Bias,” 2015)).
People also point out that the U.S. locks up way more people than any other rich country, but not because we have way more crime—sentencing laws, the war on drugs, and policing in poor neighborhoods all help drive those numbers ((Wagner and Sawyer, “Mass Incarceration: The Whole Pie 2024,” 2024)).

If you had to add just 1 sentence into your draft from “the other side” of your own argument—maybe about bias, history, or unequal policing—what would you write next, and do you want to keep working on this by clicking Continue with AI here or head over to Create Document to build or upload a full piece?

Mar 6

Student Amirah Williams smith's Question Student Amirah Williams smith and/or Thinking Partner (Mar 06 2026 2:29PM) : what part of my argument is the weakest more

Thinking Partner with Student Amirah Williams smith's edits:

This reads like a working draft where you’re thinking out loud about race, crime, and justice, which is exactly what drafting is for.
The weakest part of your argument is the claim that “some races create and commit more crimes” and that Black people “maybe…deserve” higher imprisonment, because you don’t bring in any real evidence or data to support those big statements.
Another fragile spot is saying the cop “wasn’t 100% wrong” because it’s a “reflex” to react to a Black person reaching into their pocket—you don’t question where that reflex comes from (media, stereotypes, bias) or consider examples where that same reflex gets innocent people killed.
Your paragraph about the U.S. courts and cops “protecting our rights” is also shaky because it ignores things like wrongful convictions, unequal sentencing, and cases where rights were not protected; readers will expect you to at least mention that other side if you say the system mostly works.

If you picked just one of those weak spots—race-and-crime claims, the “reflex” idea, or your praise of the court system—which one would you most want to question or complicate in your next few sentences, and do you want to keep working on that here by clicking Continue with AI or head over to Create Document to shape a fuller draft?

Mar 6

Student Amirah Williams smith's Question Student Amirah Williams smith and/or Thinking Partner (Mar 06 2026 2:49PM) : is my argument tight? more

Thinking Partner with Student Amirah Williams smith's edits:

Your draft has a clear through-line (people are responsible for their own actions and the system mostly responds to those actions), so the core idea is there.
Right now the argument isn’t “tight” because you jump between Khalil, statistics, police shootings, and praise of the U.S. system without always showing how each point logically connects to your main claim.
Some of your strongest, most “confident-sounding” lines (“it’s just proof,” “maybe they deserve it”) are actually the loosest parts, because they state big conclusions without walking the reader through careful evidence or other possible explanations.
If you want a tighter argument, you’d pick 1–2 main claims (for example: “people should be judged by actions, not race” and “the justice system is mostly fair”) and then use specific, reliable facts and clear reasoning to support those while also naming at least one serious counterargument.

If you had to choose just ONE main claim you really want to stand behind in this piece, what would that exact sentence be, and do you want to keep sharpening that claim here by clicking Continue with AI or go to Create Document to build it into a full document?

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