When | Why |
---|---|
Jan-11-25 | Naomi's image |
Jan-11-25 | Phillip's image |
Jan-11-25 | Zion's Image |
Jan-13-25 | Dallas's image |
Each the first two sections include three 3-paragraph excerpts from each text and an overarching question.
Please choose one 3-paragraph excerpt in each section and comment on each paragraph in the excerpt of your choice. In your comments, explain what your chosen excerpt shows about the overarching question.
When I made it home, Grandma wasn’t there. I was swelling from the stings, but I realized this was my chance to see if that white man was really in the work shed. Grandma kept the key to the shed on her key chain that was on the dresser under her old wigs. The key chain had a million keys on it. Plus, she had this heavy pocket blade connected to her keys. She never let me hold the blade, but you could tell from just looking at it that it could slice many necks if need be.
I took the knife and Grandma’s keys and slowly made my way out to the work shed. The shed was covered in off-white vinyl siding and, like Grandma’s house, it was raised off the ground by cinder blocks. There were two words written on the shed but they had been scratched out with a black marker. Every kid who ever saw the shed said it looked like the color of a second-grade writing tablet. You couldn’t tell how much of the off-whiteness was bought and how much of it came from just being dirty. There were no windows, just four baseball-sized holes in the back, way up at the top. Every Tuesday, from sunup to sundown, my granddaddy used to sweat up a storm in that shed. Tuesdays and Sundays were my granddaddy’s only off days. Tuesdays, he’d make tables, chairs, and cabinets out of wood. Sundays, he’d drink until he couldn’t see straight enough to use anything he’d made. Grandma took all the saws out of the shed when my granddaddy drowned, but she left all the sawdust, wood chips, and cinder blocks on the floor. I liked to mess around in there, knowing I was walking on the same sawdust my granddaddy walked on.
After my granddaddy drowned, Grandma put a deep freezer in the shed filled with ice cream and animal parts. On the walls were these wooden shelves stocked with jars of pickles, preserves, pigs’ feet, and just about anything else Grandma could think of to can. If you ever got hungry, there was always something in that shed to eat, and it was probably going to be something super country like pickled pigs’ feet or raccoon. Or ice cream sandwiches.
On Sunday morning, Grandma and I got in the Bonneville and headed to Concord Baptist Church at a little past eleven in the morning.
Nothing made sense.
I had found out that there were actually two Long Division books, the one I kept in the house and the one I decided to leave in the work shed with Sooo Sad. But the existence of at least two books was less confusing than the words in the books.
Maybe the book wasn’t a book at all, I thought. Maybe the book was the truth. If it was the truth, I had to figure out what it had to do with me. And if Baize wasn’t actually missing, but maybe just time traveling, that meant that Sooo Sad hadn’t really hurt her at all.
“City,” Grandma interrupted my thoughts while turning down the radio, “when you get saved, act like you got some sense. You hear me? Whole lotta folks get saved and it take them an entire life before they start living by God’s word. That’s them ol’ deathbed conversioners, them ol’ heathens trying to get to heaven a lifetime too late.”
I told Grandma that the car smelled like something died in the back seat and asked her who she was talking about. She ignored the comment about the smell and said that she wasn’t talking about anyone in particular.
When we made it to the dirt parking lot of Concord Baptist Church, the Bonneville stopped and Grandma swiveled her neck toward me. With her eyes a-twitching and mouth a-moving, almost in slow motion, Grandma said, “Okay now, City. It’s eleven forty-five. We still got time to send you up for altar call. Don’t act a fool up in here.”
Out in the parked Bonneville, LaVander Peeler sat in the back and I sat up front with Grandma. She sat there not saying a word for a few minutes, with one hand on my thigh and the car running. She took her hand from my thigh and cupped her face with both hands before massaging her temples with her thumbs. I placed my left hand on the back of her neck and rubbed it like she’d do to me when I couldn’t sleep.
I sat there, waiting for Grandma to say something and, really, waiting to hear from her about how being in love with Jesus was going to help us out of whatever situation we were in. I didn’t want no silly voices pass-interfering when Jesus decided to let me know what to do next. But even if you put it on the strongest leash ever, and even if you’re saved, the imagination makes more noise than a little bit and takes you wherever it wants to go.
And my imagination did exactly that. It took me right across the road into those Magic Woods and it had me stepping on dead catfish and brittle monkey bodies and the blue crossed eyeballs of white folks. All the while, all I could hear around me was Uncle Relle say-ing, “Gotdamnit. Gotdamnit. Gotdamnit.”
Jesus, I thought to myself, if you’re there, I’m not trying to cuss you. I swear I’m not.
Then, it took me back to a bed on a stage and Mama, Troll, Shay, Kincaid, and MyMy were there and they were all kissing me all over my stretch marks and showing stretch marks I never knew they had. Without warning, my imagination calmed down and took me right back to my baptism and that Halona King song was blasting on level eighty trillion.
I pulled Long Division from my bag. “Grandma, I’m fine,” I told her. “Really.”
In the fall of 1966, I hurried across campus to Howard University’s Crampton Auditorium and took a seat for freshman orientation. This was the start of my journey on the road to the good life, whatever that meant. The president, a warrior from the Brown v. Board of Education NAACP strategy team, welcomed our all black and brown class from everywhere in the diaspora, calling us the future of the race. We had been admitted, he said, in order to help raise our race. We, the talented tenth, would become all we could be, and lead our people’s progress. His message was as electrifying as the fact that he, the distinguished university president, was also black. So were the deans and administrators. It amazed me to see that black people could hold such lofty positions.
In the girl’s scholarship dorm, we buckled down, studying pharmacy, mathematics, and economics until the time we lived for came: Saturday night dances at the university ballroom. A girl down the hall had convinced me that “to be seen” at the dances I needed the sophisticated black-is-beautiful Afro of a Howard woman. The campus was leaning into Afrocentric everything. Girls wore kente cloth wrap skirts as we greeted each other in Swahili. Jambo! Habari gani? The school of social work was focused on the particular needs of the black community such as poverty and poor education, and the medical school was the center of research on sickle cell anemia, which afflicted mainly African Americans.
A dormmate criticized girls on the floor who straightened the natural curl and kink out of their hair as wanting to be like white people. It wasn’t done at Howard, that kind of self-hating denial of your own gene pool. Trying to suppress the “good hair” spawned by my white mo-ther, I sat on the floor between my friend’s knees as she rubbed alcohol-soaked cotton onto my roots and strands. My hair kinked more and blew up in volume to something worthier of hep black women. Then I hurried across campus, to show my blacker stuff in the elbow-to-armpit ballroom dance.
At a gas stop, I hesitated over the impulse to take the TripTik option to detour onto a longer way through Mississippi, down along the scenic Biloxi and Gulfport beach coast on the Gulf of Mexico. But I didn’t make that choice either. Those places probably weren’t for me, or any African Americans, even if I stayed in the car and just looked through the window. I wasn’t fool enough to risk getting caught in the dark in Mississippi. And the extra time it took might mean being too exhausted to get to Baton Rouge that night. No way would I sleep in Mississippi. So, I plowed on straight to Baton Rouge, missing all the sights that called to me, because I was afraid. As life would have it, there has never been another chance for me to see any of those places.
Luther and I got off to a good start in Baton Rouge, learning the layout of the town with very helpful assistance from the pleasant hotel staff. They pointed out landmarks, marked routes to our jobs on maps, told us how the Louisiana State University (LSU) football games took over the town. And they sent us down the Airline Highway to Ralph & Kacoo’s restaurant, where we were made comfortable by the smiling white hostess who welcomed us with chatty charm. That Cajun food was so delicious we went back again and again, each time eating the whole bowl of hot hushpuppies with fried fish from the Mississippi, Atchafalaya crawfish tails in thick étouffée sauce, seafood gumbo, and shrimp stew, but never the alligator bites. The famed southern hospitality we encountered everywhere was so lovely after New York’s brusqueness, we questioned what my father had been talking about.
Luther found a black colleague at the plant who also lived in Baton Rouge, and they began carpooling for the forty-five-mile commute. We were invited over to meet his wife and small children, where we were taken in warmly. It felt good to make that early connection, to know somebody black in town we could visit with, and to look forward to others they planned to introduce us to. The easy way we newcomers were welcomed as members of the tribe made the move feel comfortable.
When Luther got home from his newjob, he went to see how the citrus plaid couch, delivered that day, looked with the Baton Rouge sunshine streaming through the window. Pleased, he slipped his arm around my waist. “You’ve made our house mighty nice, baby. It’s beginning to feel like home.”
Our consolation prize house was a three-bedroom ranch in an older neighborhood of small quarter-acre lots, the nicest we could comfortably afford. The day we closed, Luther had planted a palm tree in the backyard where we could see it from the dining room, a flag planting of our conversion to southerners.
After dinner, we snuggled up on our new couch, watching TV, me in my nightgown. About halfway through the program, an insistent banging started on the front door, so loud Luther and I both jumped. He approached the door cautiously while I ran back to the bedroom to pull a dress over my head. I heard the door latch open, then nothing.
“Come out here,” Luther said.
He stood just inside the threshold, looking ahead like he was nailed in place. Standing beside him, I saw nobody was out there, anywhere. The street was silent and dark, except for the blaze illuminating the night sky. On our front lawn, flames jumped off a burning wooden cross, hammered into our lawn near a tree.
“Good God Almighty,” I said, a sharp tingle electrifying my spine.
We took in that symbol of hate, scared to go out. Scanning our hundred-foot frontage and then the street, we couldn’t see anybody moving. It was eerie, how still the night was, no neighbor coming outside when a fire crackled on a crucifix. Luther stepped out a few feet, and when no one appeared or spoke, he ran for the garden hose and tried to subdue the flames.
“Do you think they’re going to kill us?” I whispered.
He hesitated. “Not tonight, I don’t. There’s no mob in sheets out here. Otherwise we’d already be hurt, or dead.”
I leave my Pine wave brush to LaVander Peeler. I leave my XL mesh shorts to Shay. I leave my grown-folks books to Shay and Kincaid, and a few of my illiterate kids’ books to MyMy. I leave my cell phone to my grandma because she needs one even though they don’t ever get decent reception down here. I leave my essays to Mama. I leave my vintage Walter Payton jerseys to LaVander Peeler. I leave my new book to Grandma because she taught me how to read. I leave my Obama Loves the South T-shirt to Shay. I want to leave my spot on that TV show to Grandma, too. She’d be better than I ever would be. And if Grandma won’t do it, I leave it to that Mexican girl from Arizona, the one who I should not have dissed. I leave my password to my email, Twitter, and Facebook to my Uncle Relle. It’s W-H-0-S-T-A-N-K.
In the middle of my will in Long Division, I smelled Sooo Sad and got that feeling that someone was looking at me. I turned around and there was Uncle Relle filming me with one of his cell phones. “Oh hey, Uncle Relle. You smell funny.” “Funny how?” he said, and he put one of his hands in his pockets. “Don’t worry about how I smell, City. Keep doing you, like I ain’t even here.” “It’s hard to do me when I know you’re trying to record me doing me,” I told him. “Well, you better get good at acting like you’re doing you in the future. The reality TV shit, it’s about acting like the camera ain’t there. You can’t be looking all in the camera and making faces.” Uncle Relle turned his phone camera off and put it in some leather case he kept on his belt. “It’s a few basics that I think you haven’t really ingratiated yourself to.” “You mean gravitated to?” “Just listen, City. Close that gotdamn book.” I closed my book and braced myself for another one of Uncle Relle’s speeches.
“This writing thing, it ain’t like that hip-hop shit, City. For li’l niggas like you,” he told me, “this writing thing is like a gotdamn porta potty. It’s one li’l nigga at a time, shitting in the toilet, funking up the little space he get. And you shit a regular shit or a classic shit. Either way,” he said. “City, you gotta shit classic, then get your Black ass on off the pot.” He actually grabbed my hand. “You probably think I’m hyping you just for the money. It ain’t just about the money. It’s really not. It’s about doing whatever it takes for you to have your voice heard. So I don’t know what you’re writing in that book you always carrying around, but it better be classic because you ain’t gonna get no two times to get it right, you hear me?” “I hear you.” Uncle Relle put Grandma’s keys on the stove next to all this German chocolate cake she’d made. He told me he had some phone calls to make so he was about to walk down the road and try to find a signal. That was his way of saying he was going to buy some more weed from Alcee Mayes. When Uncle Relle walked down the road, I decided to go look in the work shed again.
I was two hours and twenty minutes from my baptism and Grandma was already at work on Monday morning. She planned on meeting Uncle Relle and me at the church on her lunch break. To tell you the truth, Grandma left the house mad as hell. First, she hated that she had agreed to make me wear this dashiki that my mama had left in her closet. I hated it, too. It was bright yellow with brown half moons and full red sun splotches all over it. She said that Mama had always wanted me baptized in the thing, but she was pissed when Mama called her and told her she wouldn’t be able to make it to Melahatchie. I could tell the dashiki was too big when Grandma handed it to me. When I put it on, the damn thing came all the way down past my navel, all the way past my thighs, and damn near touched my kneecaps. Plus, the neck part was too wide, so you could see the suit coat, vest, and tie underneath. I needed a shape-up, too, and there wasn’t one wave in my head since that white dude had taken my brush.
Uncle Relle came out on the porch while I was stewing in shame. He had a crazy smile on his face. “Anything you want to say to people before your big day?” he asked with his little phone in my face. “Naw, not really. I’m good. I just hate my outfit.” He laughed and said, “That shit looks real fucked up, but you good! Anyone you wish could be here to see you go through this day?” I just looked at him. Couldn’t believe Uncle Relle was using the word “wish.” Wasn’t his style. “Naw, Uncle Relle. I’m good.”
“I’ll be right back in like ten minutes.” I asked him where he was going, but he ignored me and jumped in his van. Ten minutes later, Uncle Relle was pulling back into the driveway and someone else was in the passenger seat with him. Uncle Relle got out, walked around the passenger side, and opened the door. In what felt like slow motion, a patent-leather blue-black Adidas hit the gravel. I knew those Adidas. Uncle Relle focused his camera phone on LaVander Peeler’s face as he got out of the van. As soon as I saw him, I thought about how stupid I looked in that damn dashiki. The LaVan-der Peeler I knew before the contest would have ethered me in one epic sentence for that outfit, but I wasn’t sure how much of that LaVander Peeler was left since he’d gone through that hell at the Coliseum. Plus, I hated that MyMy and Shay couldn’t meet him.
As soon as we pulled into Grandma’s driveway, I jumped out of the Bonneville. “City, where you think you going in such a hurry?” Grandma asked.
“I gotta go get ready to show LaVander Peeler something.”
“Oh, no you don’t. You better take your behind in there and get outta those clean clothes. We leaving in an hour.”
After mashing all my stuff in my backpack, I ran back out to tell Grandma one more thing before I left. “Grandma, if you weren’t my grandma, I’d still want to be down with you,” I told her. “I’m serious. Ufa D is the luckiest oldhead in the Mid-South. Now that I’m saved, I feel like I can be honest.”
Grandma’s crooked frown broke into a half moon. She brought her bushy brow together, tilted her head to the side, and looked me right in the eyes.
“What, Grandma? I’m serious. I’m just saying I love you. Like I for real love you. I don’t just love how you make me feel. I really love you. And until today, you were the only person I knew on earth who really loved me, too.”
“Who else you know loves you today, baby?”
“Jesus,” I told her. “Right now, I feel like Jesus likes me a whole lot, too, Grandma.”
The first day at Harvard, I took a seat in the amphitheater classroom designed to foster student debate. Of the ninety classmates who would have all our classes in that same room together the first year, I was one of only four blacks and three women. My confidence fell away as I overheard older white students extol their corporate experience, bandying business concepts about that I’d never heard of. I wondered how I got in.
My largely entitled, aggressive, and impressively smart classmates, including an Argentine aristocrat and sons of major American corporate presidents, had a lively discussion on what a good EPS was. I leaned over ask my neighbor what EPS was. As he told me ‘earnings per share,’ the look on his face was quizzical, like ‘How couldn’t you know something that simple?’ I felt like the same isolated black kid on my first day of high school honors classes. Sweating it among confident white people who believed it their due to belong there but thought I didn’t became my life.
Some white 44-Long student I didn’t know came around the curved corridor of Aldrich Hall and physically blocked me moving to my next class. That well-built preppy wanted me to know I had no business being there. What was Harvard thinking, he demanded, giving his highly qualified friend’s seat to me and rejecting the friend? Affirmative action had no place at Harvard, and I was going to waste the education. He walked off as abruptly as he’d confronted me, not waiting for a reply.
His outburst made me doubt the opportunity I had, not because I couldn’t learn what the business school taught, but because it gave me a glimpse of the personal price of dealing with that kind of attitude in business. It stressed me more to wonder if it would be worth it or if I should run while I had the chance."
The clerk in the polyester dress at Vital Records in the Marion County, Indiana, courthouse handed some forms over the counter. “Fill these out, one for each person you’re looking for,” she said without looking up.
I only had five days to find Mama’s family before getting back to New Jersey. Earlier that morning, I’d read through the yellowing pages of annual city directories at the main library, starting with the year Mama left, 1943. My grandparents, Henry and Mildred Lewis, were listed right there, the first place I looked. A tinge of some connection to these relatives was short lived, as Mildred’s name disappeared four years later, and Henry’s in six, in 1949. There was no sister Dorothy listed at all.
Now, I cooled my heels at the Vital Records Office until the clerk said there was no documentation on Mildred. There were only spotty records kept back then, she explained. Mildred must have died of consumption in 1947, like Mama predicted.
When Luther got home from his newjob, he went to see how the citrus plaid couch, delivered that day, looked with the Baton Rouge sunshine streaming through the window. Pleased, he slipped his arm around my waist. ’You’ve made our house mighty nice, baby. It’s beginning to feel like home.’
Our consolation prize house was a three-bedroom ranch in an older neighborhood of small quarter-acre lots, the nicest we could comfortably afford. The day we closed, Luther had planted a palm tree in the backyard where we could see it from the dining room, a flag planting of our conversion to southerners.
After dinner, we snuggled up on our new couch, watching TV, me in my nightgown. About halfway through the program, an insistent banging started on the front door, so loud Luther and I both jumped. He approached the door cautiously while I ran back to the bedroom to pull a dress over my head. I heard the door latch open, then nothing.
‘Come out here,’ Luther said
He stood just inside the threshold, looking ahead like he was nailed in place. Standing beside him, I saw nobody was out there, anywhere. The street was silent and dark, except for the blaze illuminating the night sky. On our front lawn, flames jumped off a burning wooden cross, hammered into our lawn near a tree.
‘Good God Almighty,’ I said, a sharp tingle electrifying my spine.
We took in that symbol of hate, scared to go out. Scanning our hundred-foot frontage and then the street, we couldn’t see anybody moving. It was eerie, how still the night was, no neighbor coming outside when a fire crackled on a crucifix. Luther stepped out a few feet, and when no one appeared or spoke, he ran for the garden hose and tried to subdue the flames."
Added January 11, 2025 at 8:05am
by TA Breese Bentum
Title: Naomi's image
Naomi W
:
AI Image
[Edited]
Naomi W
:
Reflection
City is afraid of getting baptized because he is unaware of what will happen to him. His grandmother and members of the church want him to get baptized after embarrassing his family on YouTube. In the end, City gets baptized and he is overwhelmed by his feelings but feels that now God loves him.
Added January 11, 2025 at 8:07am
by TA Breese Bentum
Title: Phillip's image
Philip H
:
Dolores image
Philip H
:
Reflection
In this image, we see Dolores as described by herself. at the point we’re in shes a bit old, with incredibly white hair, but with the features of a black woman. It feels like a representation of the underlying them of Say I’m Dead which is embracing both sides of her lineage. On one hand shes white which symbolizes the color of the hair, but the kinks and strands are that of a black womans. She still embraces that black side more then her white side, but she acknowledges where she comes from. She acknowledges her identity and her features represent that ability to fight past being stuck inbetween 2 sides and loving both.
Added January 11, 2025 at 8:09am
by TA Breese Bentum
Title: Zion's Image
zion w
:
Ai image
Added January 13, 2025 at 10:07am
by TA Breese Bentum
Title: Dallas's image
Dallas C
:
Luther
I feel that Luther’s love for his wife and house and what they built together shows his identity. After they were attacked their cross got burnt and then their house. They sent a message to Luther that they didn’t like the idea of them living there. He loved the house so much and what he and his wife built that he didn’t want to go out and do something dumb to go and lose it.
Dallas C's Question
:
Can you generate a text promprt for a visual representation of the character
Certainly! Here is an augmented text prompt for a visual representation of your character, Luther, that captures the essence of your description:
Image Prompt
Image Type: An evocative illustration of…
Main Subject: A determined and reflective character known as Luther, portrayed as a middle-aged man with a thoughtful expression. He is standing confidently, representing his love and loyalty for his family and home.
Background Scene: Set against the backdrop of a partially damaged house, which symbolizes both vulnerability and resilience. The remnants of a charred cross are subtly visible in the shadows, hinting at a past conflict and the challenges they’ve endured.
Details and Descriptors: Luther dons a simple yet elegant outfit, symbolizing inner strength and humility. He has deep brown eyes that convey a sense of resolve and peace. In his hand, he gently holds a small keepsake, representing the enduring bond with his wife. The expression on his face exudes determination and hope, while the background reveals a lush, verdant garden, indicating renewal and growth despite adversity.
Artistic Style and Composition: Illustrated in a semi-realistic style with warm, inviting colors that contrast with the remnants of destruction. The lighting is soft, emphasizing the hope and resilience that emanate from both Luther and his home. The composition uses a slightly upward perspective, enhancing the sense of strength and persistence in the character’s stance.
Additional Modifiers: Designed in high detail and resolution, capturing the intricate textures of charred wood and verdant leaves, to enhance the nuanced storytelling in the visual narrative.
Paste this prompt at perchance.org or Magic Studio or another text-to-image generator. (The two recommended here are free and do not require you to log in.)
Dallas C
:
How my picture aligns with the character
[Edited]
How my picutre aligns with the character and themes is that it shows the person how burning after something set it on fire and rain from the scene. Another way it connects to the character is they are watching the house he and his wife built to burn.After they put all of this work into it
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Design
You wrote multiple comments, but each one seems to be more like a series of observations rather than well-structured compositions. Your analysis could benefit from organizing each comment into a clear and logical flow to enhance comprehension. Aim for more thoughtful and purposeful analysis by expanding on each point you make. Think about how you might develop each comment into a short composition of 8-10 sentences with a clear introduction, supporting evidence, and a conclusion. Score: 6/10
Knowledge
You demonstrate an understanding of the book’s themes of identity and resilience, especially in the context of Luther and his wife’s experiences. However, your ideas could be more deeply supported with direct evidence from the text. Try to incorporate more direct quotes and analyze them in relation to the themes you discuss. How might you use specific instances from the text to highlight these themes more effectively? Score: 7/10
Application
You make connections to themes of family, community, and history, but these connections could be more sharply elucidated. While you mention the challenges Luther and his wife face, consider exploring the broader implications of these challenges. What analytical skills and strategies could you employ to deepen your discussion of these thematic connections? Score: 6/10
Process
You complete all aspects of the task, but there is room for more detailed attention to fully realize your analytical goals. Consider taking more time to plan and structure your comments to ensure they meet the task’s requirements. How might you refine your approach to better achieve your analytical objectives within the time constraints? Score: 6/10
Presentation
You communicate your analysis and main ideas clearly, but there are areas where language and grammar could be used more precisely. Pay attention to your sentence structure and word choice to enhance the quality and clarity of your critique. When you see errors in your text, consider if standard corrections might fit your audience or purpose. How might you revise your language to better support your analysis? Score: 6/10
Overall Score: 31/50
If you want to see more detailed feedback or have any questions about specific areas, feel free to ask!
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Design
Kayla, you’ve done a great job by writing three comments, which shows your commitment to the task. Each comment is relatively concise, but they don’t fully reach the 8-10 sentence requirement. Your thoughts are clear, but expanding on each idea with more examples or explanations could enhance your analysis. Consider structuring your comments more distinctly to ensure a logical flow that guides your reader through your analysis. Score: 6/10
Knowledge
You demonstrate an understanding of the book’s themes, particularly around identity and community, which is evident in your mention of “people of color” and “connection to family.” However, you could strengthen your analysis by directly quoting or referencing specific parts of the text to back up your points. This would show a deeper engagement with the material. Score: 7/10
Application
You touch on important thematic connections, like community and personal growth, but you could sharpen these insights with more detailed examples or by exploring how these themes relate to broader contexts, like family or history. This would make your analysis more robust and nuanced. Score: 6/10
Process
You completed the task within the time constraints, which is commendable, but there are areas where you could add more detail and depth. Paying closer attention to the task requirements, like the number of sentences, could improve your overall submission. Score: 7/10
Presentation
Your comments are generally clear, but there are some grammatical errors and informal language that might detract from your critique’s clarity and precision. Focusing on sentence structure and grammar could enhance the professionalism and readability of your analysis. Score: 6/10
Summary Score: 32/50
Kayla, your analysis shows a good understanding of the themes, but there’s room to improve by adding more detail and refining your presentation. Keep exploring different language styles, and consider how you can expand on your ideas with more specific evidence. If you’d like to see more feedback, let me know!
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Design
You have written three comments, each structured as a short composition. Your analysis is thoughtful and purposeful, focusing on themes of identity, family, and community. Your comments are generally well-organized and follow a logical flow, enhancing comprehension. However, some ideas in your comments could benefit from further elaboration or clearer transitions between thoughts. For instance, in Comment 3, you mention the deep freezer and its significance but could further connect this to broader themes of identity or resilience.
Score: 8/10
Knowledge
You demonstrate a good understanding of the book’s themes of identity and resilience. You support your ideas with evidence from the text, such as referring to the significance of the shed and City’s connection to his grandfather. However, there are opportunities to deepen your analysis by citing more specific textual evidence or exploring additional themes. For example, you could delve into how the community’s attachment to the shed reflects broader societal themes or historical context.
Score: 8/10
Application
You employ a variety of analytical skills and strategies when discussing the excerpt, effectively linking themes to family and community. You highlight the symbolic role of the shed and how it ties into City’s identity and family history. To improve, you could sharpen your thematic connections by exploring how these elements resonate with the reader’s own experiences, potentially using rhetorical questions to engage the audience more directly.
Score: 8/10
Process
You take the necessary steps to realize your analytical goals within the time constraints, completing all aspects of the task with attention to detail. Your comments cover a range of ideas, and you explore different dimensions of the text. However, you might consider how to balance breadth and depth in your analysis, ensuring that each idea is fully developed and supported.
Score: 9/10
Presentation
You effectively communicate your analysis and main ideas clearly and cohesively. Your language is generally precise, although there are moments where more varied sentence structures or vocabulary could enhance your critique. Additionally, consider how you might incorporate more of your unique voice or rhetorical style into your writing to engage the audience on a deeper level.
Score: 8/10
Summary Score: 41/50
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Design
Philip, you did a solid job by writing three comments, each with a thoughtful analysis. Your comments are generally well-organized and have a logical flow that helps in understanding your points. However, some sentences could be clearer and more concise to enhance comprehension. For example, you wrote, “Howard University is an example of that resilience itself.” This is a bit vague and could be expanded to better explain what kind of resilience you mean. Aim for a clearer structure in each comment, ensuring that your ideas are presented in a way that builds upon each other effectively. Overall, you have a good start here.
Score: 7/10
Knowledge
You demonstrate a good understanding of the themes of identity and resilience. You provide relevant examples from the text, like the role of Howard University and its president’s involvement in the Brown V. Board of Education case. You also touch on the cultural pressures faced by Dolores and how the university attempts to empower the Black community. However, you could strengthen your analysis by providing more direct quotes from the text to support your points. This will make your argument more convincing and grounded in the source material.
Score: 8/10
Application
You employ various analytical skills, linking themes of identity and resilience to the context of family and community. Your comments on the afrocentric ideas of the school and Dolores’ struggle with her identity are insightful. However, you could delve deeper into these thematic connections and explore how they relate to broader historical or societal contexts. Consider how these themes might resonate with the experiences of Black communities beyond the text, which would sharpen your analysis further.
Score: 7/10
Process
You completed all aspects of the task and paid attention to detail in your analysis. However, there are areas where more detailed examination could enhance your work. For instance, when discussing Dolores’ hair and identity struggles, you could explore the historical significance of hair in Black culture in more depth. This would show a more comprehensive understanding of the topic and further realize your analytical goals.
Score: 8/10
Presentation
Your writing effectively communicates the main ideas, but there are minor grammatical issues that can affect the clarity of your analysis. For example, “aswell” should be “as well,” and “their” should be “there” in the context of your sentence. Paying attention to these details will enhance the precision and professionalism of your writing. You also have a good use of conversational tone, which is engaging, yet remember to balance it with formal academic language where necessary.
Score: 6/10
Summary Score: 36/50
If you’d like to delve deeper into any specific area from this feedback or want more guidance on how to enhance your writing, just let me know!
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Design
You have structured your response into three distinct comments, which is great for organization. Each comment has a clear focus and progresses logically, enhancing the flow and comprehension of your analysis. However, the comments could be expanded to fully meet the expectation of 8-10 sentences, providing more depth and detail. Aim for a more thorough exploration of your ideas to fully capture the complexity of the themes you’re addressing.
Score: 7/10
Knowledge
You demonstrate a solid understanding of the themes of identity and resilience, particularly in how you describe Dolares’s experiences at Howard University. Your comments reflect on how Howard’s environment impacts her identity and sense of belonging. However, incorporating more direct evidence from the text would strengthen your analysis. Consider quoting specific parts of the text to support your points and provide a stronger foundation for your observations.
Score: 6/10
Application
You employ some analytical skills and strategies in discussing the excerpt, like connecting Dolares’s experiences to broader themes of identity and community. You also touch upon thematic connections to the Black community and cultural heritage. To enhance your analysis, try to delve deeper into these connections and provide more nuanced insights into how they shape the character’s journey and development.
Score: 7/10
Process
Your response shows that you have taken steps to realize your analytical goals, but there’s room for more detailed exploration. While you address key themes and ideas, expanding on these with more specific examples and analysis would help fully realize your potential in this task. Pay attention to detail in each comment to ensure that you are thoroughly addressing all aspects of the prompt.
Score: 6/10
Presentation
You communicate your analysis clearly and cohesively, but there are some areas where language and grammar could be used more precisely. Consider revising sentence structures for clarity and ensuring that your ideas are presented in a polished manner. This will enhance the overall quality and clarity of your critique and make your points more impactful.
Score: 6/10
Summary Score: 32/50
If you want more feedback or advice on any part, feel free to ask!
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Sure, let’s go through each of the criteria and evaluate Dallas’s work:
Design
Dallas effectively engages with both the Improv Teammate and the Writing Partners, discussing the themes of social justice and belonging through several exchanges. Dallas starts conversations with questions or statements, prompting thoughtful responses from the Writing Partner. For example, Dallas asks, “How do the authors use narrative techniques to reveal the complexities of social justice and belonging?” This shows intent to delve deeper into the text’s themes. There are at least five statements or questions maintaining a clear and logical connection throughout the conversation. Your conversation is coherent and well-structured, meeting the criteria for thoughtfulness and purpose.
Score: 5
Knowledge
Dallas demonstrates a good understanding of the book’s themes of social justice and belonging. There are clear references to the text, such as exploring family roots and uncovering stories that highlight structural shifts or struggles. Dallas also mentions the significance of historical narratives, like the importance of Mildred’s story, showing an awareness of how these narratives connect to broader social justice issues. However, the analysis could be strengthened by incorporating more direct evidence or quotes from the text.
Score: 4
Application
Dallas engages well with the Writing Partner and seems to understand their responses, expanding the conversation thoughtfully. For instance, when discussing the narrative techniques and their impact, Dallas reflects on the emotional weight of uncovering personal histories and the challenge of reclaiming belonging. This shows a clear exploration of the themes of social justice and belonging. You effectively engage with the responses in a way that furthers the conversation.
Score: 5
Process
Dallas asks open-ended questions that expand the conversation, such as, “Do you want more on this?” and “Curious if this exploration has sparked any specific questions or themes you’re looking to explore further?” This indicates an effort to extend the dialogue and explore the text’s issues deeply. There are more than five replies, demonstrating a developed and engaging conversation.
Score: 6
Presentation
Dallas communicates the analysis and main ideas clearly and cohesively. The questions posed are articulate and precise, effectively supporting the critique’s quality and clarity. Language use is generally effective, but there could be more variation in the types of questions asked to enhance depth. Consider exploring different angles or perspectives within the text to enrich your analysis.
Score: 5
Summary
Overall, Dallas’s work displays a strong engagement with the themes of social justice and belonging within the text. The conversation is thoughtful, purposeful, and demonstrates an understanding of the issues discussed. While the analysis is generally clear and cohesive, incorporating more direct textual evidence and varying the types of questions could further strengthen the critique.
Total Score: 25/30
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Design
Score: 5
Naomi engages with both the Kiese Laymon Simulator and the Improv Teammate, fulfilling the requirement to interact with two Writing Partners. She starts conversations about issues in the text, like the complexity of City’s character and his interactions with Grandma, and she prompts the AI with thoughtful and purposeful questions. Naomi provides more than five questions or statements, maintaining clear and logical connections throughout the exchanges. However, there could be a bit more depth in connecting the questions to each other for a higher score.
Knowledge
Score: 5
Naomi demonstrates a good understanding of the themes of social justice and belonging in Kiese Laymon’s work. She discusses City’s experiences and interactions with others, such as the scene in the store with Grandma, reflecting on how these experiences reveal racial injustice and belonging. However, while she provides meaningful insights, there could be more direct evidence from the text to support her ideas for a higher score.
Application
Score: 5
Naomi understands the Writing Partner’s responses and engages in conversations that expand on the themes of social justice and belonging. She explores the dynamics between City and his grandmother, as well as City’s personal journey, showing how these elements reflect broader societal issues. To improve, Naomi could delve deeper into specific examples or scenes that illustrate these themes more clearly.
Process
Score: 5
Naomi asks open-ended questions that expand and extend the conversation, like exploring City’s relationship with Grandma and their different perceptions of belonging. She actively participates in discussions, prompting further exploration of the text. While she does develop the conversation, more in-depth analysis or elaboration on certain points could enhance the depth.
Presentation
Score: 6
Naomi effectively communicates her analysis and main ideas clearly and cohesively. Her questions are precise and contribute to the clarity and quality of the critique. She uses language and grammar correctly, making her critique accessible and engaging. Naomi’s presentation is well-developed and effectively conveys her understanding of the text.
Summary Score
Total: 26/30
Naomi’s work demonstrates a strong grasp of the themes of social justice and belonging in Kiese Laymon’s narrative. She engages thoughtfully with the Writing Partners, posing relevant questions and expanding the conversation. For future improvement, Naomi might focus on incorporating more direct textual evidence and deepening her analysis of specific scenes or interactions within the text. Overall, her performance is commendable and shows a solid understanding of the material.
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Sure! Let’s break down Philip H’s work according to the criteria provided.
Design
- You engaged in conversation with the Improv Teammate and explored themes related to the text.
- You initiated meaningful discussions about Dolores’ experiences and her identity at Harvard.
- Your exchange was thoughtful, with logical connections between comments and questions.
- You provided more than five prompts that furthered the conversation.
Score: 6/6
You exceeded expectations by maintaining a cohesive and engaging dialogue that explored complex themes.
Knowledge
- You demonstrated a deep understanding of the book’s themes, particularly regarding social justice and belonging.
- You highlighted the challenges Dolores faces as a Black woman at Harvard, supported by direct references to her experiences.
Score: 6/6
Your insights into the text’s social justice themes were well-supported and demonstrated a strong grasp of the material.
Application
- You effectively engaged with the Writing Partner’s responses, expanding on ideas and exploring themes like resilience and identity.
- Your questions and comments reflected a nuanced understanding of social justice and belonging.
Score: 6/6
You showed a strong ability to apply your understanding in a thoughtful and explorative manner.
Process
- You asked open-ended questions that extended the conversation, promoting a deeper discussion of the text.
- Your dialogue included numerous replies, allowing for a comprehensive exploration of the themes.
Score: 6/6
You thoroughly discussed the text, going beyond surface-level engagement to address deeper issues.
Presentation
- You communicated your analysis clearly, with language and grammar that supported the clarity of your critique.
- Your questions were precise and effectively conveyed your main ideas.
Score: 6/6
Your communication was clear and cohesive, enhancing the quality of your analysis.
Overall Summary Score: 30/30
Philip, you did an outstanding job in your conversation with the Writing Partner. You explored the themes of identity and resilience with depth and clarity while maintaining a thoughtful and engaging dialogue. Keep up the excellent work!
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Design
You did a fantastic job engaging with the Improv Teammate, and your conversation was both thoughtful and purposeful. You started the discussion with a relevant question about how the book allows readers to reflect on their own identity, which set the tone for a meaningful exchange. You made clear and logical connections throughout your questions and comments, prompting the Writing Partner with a series of questions that kept the conversation flowing. However, you only engaged with one Writing Partner, rather than two, as the criteria suggest. Therefore, for this section, I would score you a 5.
Knowledge
You demonstrated a deep understanding of the book’s themes of social justice and belonging. Your questions and comments reflected a good grasp of how identity and self-worth are influenced by social and historical contexts. This is evident when you explored how being in different environments can affect self-worth and when you asked about the implications of being a Black woman during a specific time period. However, there wasn’t direct evidence from the text in your responses. Therefore, I would score you a 5.
Application
You showed a strong ability to understand and engage with the Writing Partner’s responses. You effectively expanded on the conversation, exploring the themes of social justice and belonging in depth. Your questions invited the Writing Partner to delve deeper into the discussion, showing your understanding of the topic. Your engagement with the Writing Partner was reflective and exploratory, as seen in your questions about resilience and identity. For this, I would score you a 6.
Process
You asked open-ended questions that expanded and extended the conversation, such as how Dolares might feel about her self-worth or how she might overcome her circumstances. Your questions encouraged a deeper discussion of the themes in the text. You developed a conversation with more than five replies, showing that the discussion was in-depth and comprehensive. For this, I would score you a 6.
Presentation
Your questions effectively communicated your analysis and main ideas clearly and cohesively. You used language and grammar precisely, which supported the quality and clarity of your critique. Your questions were structured well, and you maintained a clear line of inquiry that guided the conversation. For this, I would score you a 6.
Summary
Overall, you did an excellent job in engaging with the Writing Partner and exploring the themes of the text. Your scores reflect your ability to design a thoughtful exchange, demonstrate knowledge, apply understanding, follow a comprehensive process, and present your ideas clearly. Your total score for this section is 28 out of 30. Keep up the great work, and consider incorporating direct evidence from the text to strengthen your analysis even further.
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Design
Your image showcases a unique approach by using a formal setting with characters dressed in suits, which suggests themes of identity and resilience. The inclusion of the yellow flower adds an imaginative element that stands out and invites curiosity. Consider how the artistic style and composition contribute to the character’s essence.
Score: 4
Knowledge
The emotions evoked in the image are clear, with the central character’s expression drawing attention. The solemn and unified presence of the group enhances the themes of identity and resilience. Think about how the emotional undertones connect with the audience and their lasting impact.
Score: 4
Application
Technically, the image is well-executed, with attention to detail in the characters’ attire and expressions. The use of the medium effectively conveys the themes and character traits. Reflect on your craftsmanship and how it serves the narrative.
Score: 4
Process
The image aligns well with the situational context, possibly reflecting a formal or significant event in the character’s life. The setting and attire suggest an awareness of cultural or historical elements. Consider how these references enhance the story’s context.
Score: 4
Presentation
Your image captures the viewer’s attention and encourages deeper contemplation, especially through the central character’s expression and the symbolic flower. Explore ways to further invite audience interaction and reflection.
Score: 4
Summary Score: 20/20
Great job! The image you created effectively communicates the intended themes and character essence. Keep exploring imaginative elements and how they can deepen the narrative.
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I can’t identify people in images, but I can help evaluate the artistic elements of the image based on the criteria provided.
Design
The image shows a thoughtful representation of a character with a calm and confident demeanor. The use of light and shadow, along with the choice of attire and accessories, suggests a sense of wisdom and elegance. However, there’s room for more imaginative elements that could enhance the thematic depth related to love, resilience, and identity. Score: 3/4
Knowledge
The emotional undertones of the image are clear, conveying a sense of warmth and wisdom. The expression and setting suggest resilience and identity, but the connection to love could be made more explicit. The image leaves a positive impression but could be more evocative in terms of emotional impact. Score: 3/4
Application
The technical aspects, such as composition, color, and clarity, are executed proficiently. The choice of medium effectively conveys the character’s persona. There’s strong attention to detail, although further exploration of artistic techniques could enhance the overall craftsmanship. Score: 3/4
Process
The image seems to capture a modern, everyday context, aligning well with the cultural and situational aspects of a character who embodies wisdom and experience. However, incorporating more specific symbols or references could strengthen the connection to broader themes and settings. Score: 3/4
Presentation
The image is engaging and captures attention through its strong character portrayal. While it invites some reflection, additional interactive or thought-provoking elements could encourage deeper contemplation. Score: 3/4
Summary
Overall Score: 15/20
You’ve created a strong and thoughtful representation. To enhance your work, consider incorporating more imaginative and thematic elements that deepen the connection to the themes of love, resilience, and identity. Keep experimenting with artistic techniques to further elevate your storytelling through imagery.
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Design
Your image displays a unique approach that effectively captures the essence of the character. The dual portraits suggest layers of identity and emotion, which aligns well with themes of resilience and identity. The style is striking, with the hair and expressions adding depth and originality. Consider adding more imaginative elements to further provoke thought.
Score: 3/4
Knowledge
The image evokes a strong emotional connection, especially through the expressions and the stormy background. It resonates well with the themes of love, resilience, and identity. The emotional undertones are clear and impactful, making a lasting impression.
Score: 4/4
Application
The technical craftsmanship is excellent, with detailed attention to facial features, hair texture, and lighting. The use of digital techniques effectively conveys the character’s complexity. Continue to explore other techniques that might add further depth to the representation.
Score: 4/4
Process
The image aligns well with the character’s context, with subtle references to broader situational themes. The background and clothing choices reflect an awareness of the character’s environment. Consider integrating more symbols that might enhance the story’s cultural or historical context.
Score: 3/4
Presentation
Your image captures the viewer’s attention with its compelling emotional depth and artistic style. It invites deeper reflection on the character’s journey and themes. Think about adding elements that might encourage even more interaction or contemplation.
Score: 4/4
Summary
Overall, you did a remarkable job creating an image that captures the complexity of the character and the themes of resilience and identity. Focus on incorporating even more imaginative elements and symbolic references to enhance your work further.
Total Score: 18/20
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Evaluation of Your Image
1. Design: 4/4
Your image showcases a unique approach in capturing the character’s essence. The juxtaposition of the dignified expression with the damaged house in the background adds depth to the themes of resilience and identity. The artistic style is both striking and thought-provoking, encouraging viewers to consider the symbolism of the setting and the character’s demeanor. Great job incorporating imaginative elements that enhance understanding.
2. Knowledge: 4/4
The emotions conveyed through the character’s expression are powerful and resonate with the themes of resilience and identity. The image leaves a lasting impression, evoking a strong emotional response. The choice of background and character expression clearly communicates the character’s significance and role in the story.
3. Application: 4/4
The technical execution of the image is highly proficient. The attention to detail in the character’s features and the textures of the house demonstrate excellent craftsmanship. The medium effectively conveys the intended themes, showcasing your skill in digital manipulation and artistic techniques.
4. Process: 3/4
While the image aligns well with the character’s cultural and situational context, more explicit references or symbols could further enhance its relevance to the story’s setting. Consider integrating additional elements that reflect the broader circumstances surrounding the character to deepen this connection.
5. Presentation: 4/4
The image captivates and engages the viewer’s attention effectively. The composition invites viewers to explore and reflect on the themes present, encouraging deeper contemplation. The combination of visual elements successfully invites interaction and thought.
Summary Score: 19/20
Your image is beautifully crafted, with strong emotional and thematic resonance. Consider exploring more contextual symbols to enhance the storytelling aspect. Keep up the great work!
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