When | Why |
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Jan-11-25 | Maddox's image |
Jan-11-25 | Rickiyah's image |
Each the first two sections include three 3-paragraph excerpts from each text and an overarching question.
Please choose one 3-paragraph excerpt in each section and comment on each paragraph in the excerpt of your choice. In your comments, explain what your chosen excerpt shows about the overarching question.
When I made it home, Grandma wasn’t there. I was swelling from the stings, but I realized this was my chance to see if that white man was really in the work shed. Grandma kept the key to the shed on her key chain that was on the dresser under her old wigs. The key chain had a million keys on it. Plus, she had this heavy pocket blade connected to her keys. She never let me hold the blade, but you could tell from just looking at it that it could slice many necks if need be.
I took the knife and Grandma’s keys and slowly made my way out to the work shed. The shed was covered in off-white vinyl siding and, like Grandma’s house, it was raised off the ground by cinder blocks. There were two words written on the shed but they had been scratched out with a black marker. Every kid who ever saw the shed said it looked like the color of a second-grade writing tablet. You couldn’t tell how much of the off-whiteness was bought and how much of it came from just being dirty. There were no windows, just four baseball-sized holes in the back, way up at the top. Every Tuesday, from sunup to sundown, my granddaddy used to sweat up a storm in that shed. Tuesdays and Sundays were my granddaddy’s only off days. Tuesdays, he’d make tables, chairs, and cabinets out of wood. Sundays, he’d drink until he couldn’t see straight enough to use anything he’d made. Grandma took all the saws out of the shed when my granddaddy drowned, but she left all the sawdust, wood chips, and cinder blocks on the floor. I liked to mess around in there, knowing I was walking on the same sawdust my granddaddy walked on.
After my granddaddy drowned, Grandma put a deep freezer in the shed filled with ice cream and animal parts. On the walls were these wooden shelves stocked with jars of pickles, preserves, pigs’ feet, and just about anything else Grandma could think of to can. If you ever got hungry, there was always something in that shed to eat, and it was probably going to be something super country like pickled pigs’ feet or raccoon. Or ice cream sandwiches.
On Sunday morning, Grandma and I got in the Bonneville and headed to Concord Baptist Church at a little past eleven in the morning.
Nothing made sense.
I had found out that there were actually two Long Division books, the one I kept in the house and the one I decided to leave in the work shed with Sooo Sad. But the existence of at least two books was less confusing than the words in the books.
Maybe the book wasn’t a book at all, I thought. Maybe the book was the truth. If it was the truth, I had to figure out what it had to do with me. And if Baize wasn’t actually missing, but maybe just time traveling, that meant that Sooo Sad hadn’t really hurt her at all.
“City,” Grandma interrupted my thoughts while turning down the radio, “when you get saved, act like you got some sense. You hear me? Whole lotta folks get saved and it take them an entire life before they start living by God’s word. That’s them ol’ deathbed conversioners, them ol’ heathens trying to get to heaven a lifetime too late.”
I told Grandma that the car smelled like something died in the back seat and asked her who she was talking about. She ignored the comment about the smell and said that she wasn’t talking about anyone in particular.
When we made it to the dirt parking lot of Concord Baptist Church, the Bonneville stopped and Grandma swiveled her neck toward me. With her eyes a-twitching and mouth a-moving, almost in slow motion, Grandma said, “Okay now, City. It’s eleven forty-five. We still got time to send you up for altar call. Don’t act a fool up in here.”
Out in the parked Bonneville, LaVander Peeler sat in the back and I sat up front with Grandma. She sat there not saying a word for a few minutes, with one hand on my thigh and the car running. She took her hand from my thigh and cupped her face with both hands before massaging her temples with her thumbs. I placed my left hand on the back of her neck and rubbed it like she’d do to me when I couldn’t sleep.
I sat there, waiting for Grandma to say something and, really, waiting to hear from her about how being in love with Jesus was going to help us out of whatever situation we were in. I didn’t want no silly voices pass-interfering when Jesus decided to let me know what to do next. But even if you put it on the strongest leash ever, and even if you’re saved, the imagination makes more noise than a little bit and takes you wherever it wants to go.
And my imagination did exactly that. It took me right across the road into those Magic Woods and it had me stepping on dead catfish and brittle monkey bodies and the blue crossed eyeballs of white folks. All the while, all I could hear around me was Uncle Relle say-ing, “Gotdamnit. Gotdamnit. Gotdamnit.”
Jesus, I thought to myself, if you’re there, I’m not trying to cuss you. I swear I’m not.
Then, it took me back to a bed on a stage and Mama, Troll, Shay, Kincaid, and MyMy were there and they were all kissing me all over my stretch marks and showing stretch marks I never knew they had. Without warning, my imagination calmed down and took me right back to my baptism and that Halona King song was blasting on level eighty trillion.
I pulled Long Division from my bag. “Grandma, I’m fine,” I told her. “Really.”
In the fall of 1966, I hurried across campus to Howard University’s Crampton Auditorium and took a seat for freshman orientation. This was the start of my journey on the road to the good life, whatever that meant. The president, a warrior from the Brown v. Board of Education NAACP strategy team, welcomed our all black and brown class from everywhere in the diaspora, calling us the future of the race. We had been admitted, he said, in order to help raise our race. We, the talented tenth, would become all we could be, and lead our people’s progress. His message was as electrifying as the fact that he, the distinguished university president, was also black. So were the deans and administrators. It amazed me to see that black people could hold such lofty positions.
In the girl’s scholarship dorm, we buckled down, studying pharmacy, mathematics, and economics until the time we lived for came: Saturday night dances at the university ballroom. A girl down the hall had convinced me that “to be seen” at the dances I needed the sophisticated black-is-beautiful Afro of a Howard woman. The campus was leaning into Afrocentric everything. Girls wore kente cloth wrap skirts as we greeted each other in Swahili. Jambo! Habari gani? The school of social work was focused on the particular needs of the black community such as poverty and poor education, and the medical school was the center of research on sickle cell anemia, which afflicted mainly African Americans.
A dormmate criticized girls on the floor who straightened the natural curl and kink out of their hair as wanting to be like white people. It wasn’t done at Howard, that kind of self-hating denial of your own gene pool. Trying to suppress the “good hair” spawned by my white mo-ther, I sat on the floor between my friend’s knees as she rubbed alcohol-soaked cotton onto my roots and strands. My hair kinked more and blew up in volume to something worthier of hep black women. Then I hurried across campus, to show my blacker stuff in the elbow-to-armpit ballroom dance.
At a gas stop, I hesitated over the impulse to take the TripTik option to detour onto a longer way through Mississippi, down along the scenic Biloxi and Gulfport beach coast on the Gulf of Mexico. But I didn’t make that choice either. Those places probably weren’t for me, or any African Americans, even if I stayed in the car and just looked through the window. I wasn’t fool enough to risk getting caught in the dark in Mississippi. And the extra time it took might mean being too exhausted to get to Baton Rouge that night. No way would I sleep in Mississippi. So, I plowed on straight to Baton Rouge, missing all the sights that called to me, because I was afraid. As life would have it, there has never been another chance for me to see any of those places.
Luther and I got off to a good start in Baton Rouge, learning the layout of the town with very helpful assistance from the pleasant hotel staff. They pointed out landmarks, marked routes to our jobs on maps, told us how the Louisiana State University (LSU) football games took over the town. And they sent us down the Airline Highway to Ralph & Kacoo’s restaurant, where we were made comfortable by the smiling white hostess who welcomed us with chatty charm. That Cajun food was so delicious we went back again and again, each time eating the whole bowl of hot hushpuppies with fried fish from the Mississippi, Atchafalaya crawfish tails in thick étouffée sauce, seafood gumbo, and shrimp stew, but never the alligator bites. The famed southern hospitality we encountered everywhere was so lovely after New York’s brusqueness, we questioned what my father had been talking about.
Luther found a black colleague at the plant who also lived in Baton Rouge, and they began carpooling for the forty-five-mile commute. We were invited over to meet his wife and small children, where we were taken in warmly. It felt good to make that early connection, to know somebody black in town we could visit with, and to look forward to others they planned to introduce us to. The easy way we newcomers were welcomed as members of the tribe made the move feel comfortable.
When Luther got home from his newjob, he went to see how the citrus plaid couch, delivered that day, looked with the Baton Rouge sunshine streaming through the window. Pleased, he slipped his arm around my waist. “You’ve made our house mighty nice, baby. It’s beginning to feel like home.”
Our consolation prize house was a three-bedroom ranch in an older neighborhood of small quarter-acre lots, the nicest we could comfortably afford. The day we closed, Luther had planted a palm tree in the backyard where we could see it from the dining room, a flag planting of our conversion to southerners.
After dinner, we snuggled up on our new couch, watching TV, me in my nightgown. About halfway through the program, an insistent banging started on the front door, so loud Luther and I both jumped. He approached the door cautiously while I ran back to the bedroom to pull a dress over my head. I heard the door latch open, then nothing.
“Come out here,” Luther said.
He stood just inside the threshold, looking ahead like he was nailed in place. Standing beside him, I saw nobody was out there, anywhere. The street was silent and dark, except for the blaze illuminating the night sky. On our front lawn, flames jumped off a burning wooden cross, hammered into our lawn near a tree.
“Good God Almighty,” I said, a sharp tingle electrifying my spine.
We took in that symbol of hate, scared to go out. Scanning our hundred-foot frontage and then the street, we couldn’t see anybody moving. It was eerie, how still the night was, no neighbor coming outside when a fire crackled on a crucifix. Luther stepped out a few feet, and when no one appeared or spoke, he ran for the garden hose and tried to subdue the flames.
“Do you think they’re going to kill us?” I whispered.
He hesitated. “Not tonight, I don’t. There’s no mob in sheets out here. Otherwise we’d already be hurt, or dead.”
I leave my Pine wave brush to LaVander Peeler. I leave my XL mesh shorts to Shay. I leave my grown-folks books to Shay and Kincaid, and a few of my illiterate kids’ books to MyMy. I leave my cell phone to my grandma because she needs one even though they don’t ever get decent reception down here. I leave my essays to Mama. I leave my vintage Walter Payton jerseys to LaVander Peeler. I leave my new book to Grandma because she taught me how to read. I leave my Obama Loves the South T-shirt to Shay. I want to leave my spot on that TV show to Grandma, too. She’d be better than I ever would be. And if Grandma won’t do it, I leave it to that Mexican girl from Arizona, the one who I should not have dissed. I leave my password to my email, Twitter, and Facebook to my Uncle Relle. It’s W-H-0-S-T-A-N-K.
In the middle of my will in Long Division, I smelled Sooo Sad and got that feeling that someone was looking at me. I turned around and there was Uncle Relle filming me with one of his cell phones. “Oh hey, Uncle Relle. You smell funny.” “Funny how?” he said, and he put one of his hands in his pockets. “Don’t worry about how I smell, City. Keep doing you, like I ain’t even here.” “It’s hard to do me when I know you’re trying to record me doing me,” I told him. “Well, you better get good at acting like you’re doing you in the future. The reality TV shit, it’s about acting like the camera ain’t there. You can’t be looking all in the camera and making faces.” Uncle Relle turned his phone camera off and put it in some leather case he kept on his belt. “It’s a few basics that I think you haven’t really ingratiated yourself to.” “You mean gravitated to?” “Just listen, City. Close that gotdamn book.” I closed my book and braced myself for another one of Uncle Relle’s speeches.
“This writing thing, it ain’t like that hip-hop shit, City. For li’l niggas like you,” he told me, “this writing thing is like a gotdamn porta potty. It’s one li’l nigga at a time, shitting in the toilet, funking up the little space he get. And you shit a regular shit or a classic shit. Either way,” he said. “City, you gotta shit classic, then get your Black ass on off the pot.” He actually grabbed my hand. “You probably think I’m hyping you just for the money. It ain’t just about the money. It’s really not. It’s about doing whatever it takes for you to have your voice heard. So I don’t know what you’re writing in that book you always carrying around, but it better be classic because you ain’t gonna get no two times to get it right, you hear me?” “I hear you.” Uncle Relle put Grandma’s keys on the stove next to all this German chocolate cake she’d made. He told me he had some phone calls to make so he was about to walk down the road and try to find a signal. That was his way of saying he was going to buy some more weed from Alcee Mayes. When Uncle Relle walked down the road, I decided to go look in the work shed again.
I was two hours and twenty minutes from my baptism and Grandma was already at work on Monday morning. She planned on meeting Uncle Relle and me at the church on her lunch break. To tell you the truth, Grandma left the house mad as hell. First, she hated that she had agreed to make me wear this dashiki that my mama had left in her closet. I hated it, too. It was bright yellow with brown half moons and full red sun splotches all over it. She said that Mama had always wanted me baptized in the thing, but she was pissed when Mama called her and told her she wouldn’t be able to make it to Melahatchie. I could tell the dashiki was too big when Grandma handed it to me. When I put it on, the damn thing came all the way down past my navel, all the way past my thighs, and damn near touched my kneecaps. Plus, the neck part was too wide, so you could see the suit coat, vest, and tie underneath. I needed a shape-up, too, and there wasn’t one wave in my head since that white dude had taken my brush.
Uncle Relle came out on the porch while I was stewing in shame. He had a crazy smile on his face. “Anything you want to say to people before your big day?” he asked with his little phone in my face. “Naw, not really. I’m good. I just hate my outfit.” He laughed and said, “That shit looks real fucked up, but you good! Anyone you wish could be here to see you go through this day?” I just looked at him. Couldn’t believe Uncle Relle was using the word “wish.” Wasn’t his style. “Naw, Uncle Relle. I’m good.”
“I’ll be right back in like ten minutes.” I asked him where he was going, but he ignored me and jumped in his van. Ten minutes later, Uncle Relle was pulling back into the driveway and someone else was in the passenger seat with him. Uncle Relle got out, walked around the passenger side, and opened the door. In what felt like slow motion, a patent-leather blue-black Adidas hit the gravel. I knew those Adidas. Uncle Relle focused his camera phone on LaVander Peeler’s face as he got out of the van. As soon as I saw him, I thought about how stupid I looked in that damn dashiki. The LaVan-der Peeler I knew before the contest would have ethered me in one epic sentence for that outfit, but I wasn’t sure how much of that LaVander Peeler was left since he’d gone through that hell at the Coliseum. Plus, I hated that MyMy and Shay couldn’t meet him.
As soon as we pulled into Grandma’s driveway, I jumped out of the Bonneville. “City, where you think you going in such a hurry?” Grandma asked.
“I gotta go get ready to show LaVander Peeler something.”
“Oh, no you don’t. You better take your behind in there and get outta those clean clothes. We leaving in an hour.”
After mashing all my stuff in my backpack, I ran back out to tell Grandma one more thing before I left. “Grandma, if you weren’t my grandma, I’d still want to be down with you,” I told her. “I’m serious. Ufa D is the luckiest oldhead in the Mid-South. Now that I’m saved, I feel like I can be honest.”
Grandma’s crooked frown broke into a half moon. She brought her bushy brow together, tilted her head to the side, and looked me right in the eyes.
“What, Grandma? I’m serious. I’m just saying I love you. Like I for real love you. I don’t just love how you make me feel. I really love you. And until today, you were the only person I knew on earth who really loved me, too.”
“Who else you know loves you today, baby?”
“Jesus,” I told her. “Right now, I feel like Jesus likes me a whole lot, too, Grandma.”
The first day at Harvard, I took a seat in the amphitheater classroom designed to foster student debate. Of the ninety classmates who would have all our classes in that same room together the first year, I was one of only four blacks and three women. My confidence fell away as I overheard older white students extol their corporate experience, bandying business concepts about that I’d never heard of. I wondered how I got in.
My largely entitled, aggressive, and impressively smart classmates, including an Argentine aristocrat and sons of major American corporate presidents, had a lively discussion on what a good EPS was. I leaned over ask my neighbor what EPS was. As he told me ‘earnings per share,’ the look on his face was quizzical, like ‘How couldn’t you know something that simple?’ I felt like the same isolated black kid on my first day of high school honors classes. Sweating it among confident white people who believed it their due to belong there but thought I didn’t became my life.
Some white 44-Long student I didn’t know came around the curved corridor of Aldrich Hall and physically blocked me moving to my next class. That well-built preppy wanted me to know I had no business being there. What was Harvard thinking, he demanded, giving his highly qualified friend’s seat to me and rejecting the friend? Affirmative action had no place at Harvard, and I was going to waste the education. He walked off as abruptly as he’d confronted me, not waiting for a reply.
His outburst made me doubt the opportunity I had, not because I couldn’t learn what the business school taught, but because it gave me a glimpse of the personal price of dealing with that kind of attitude in business. It stressed me more to wonder if it would be worth it or if I should run while I had the chance."
The clerk in the polyester dress at Vital Records in the Marion County, Indiana, courthouse handed some forms over the counter. “Fill these out, one for each person you’re looking for,” she said without looking up.
I only had five days to find Mama’s family before getting back to New Jersey. Earlier that morning, I’d read through the yellowing pages of annual city directories at the main library, starting with the year Mama left, 1943. My grandparents, Henry and Mildred Lewis, were listed right there, the first place I looked. A tinge of some connection to these relatives was short lived, as Mildred’s name disappeared four years later, and Henry’s in six, in 1949. There was no sister Dorothy listed at all.
Now, I cooled my heels at the Vital Records Office until the clerk said there was no documentation on Mildred. There were only spotty records kept back then, she explained. Mildred must have died of consumption in 1947, like Mama predicted.
When Luther got home from his newjob, he went to see how the citrus plaid couch, delivered that day, looked with the Baton Rouge sunshine streaming through the window. Pleased, he slipped his arm around my waist. ’You’ve made our house mighty nice, baby. It’s beginning to feel like home.’
Our consolation prize house was a three-bedroom ranch in an older neighborhood of small quarter-acre lots, the nicest we could comfortably afford. The day we closed, Luther had planted a palm tree in the backyard where we could see it from the dining room, a flag planting of our conversion to southerners.
After dinner, we snuggled up on our new couch, watching TV, me in my nightgown. About halfway through the program, an insistent banging started on the front door, so loud Luther and I both jumped. He approached the door cautiously while I ran back to the bedroom to pull a dress over my head. I heard the door latch open, then nothing.
‘Come out here,’ Luther said
He stood just inside the threshold, looking ahead like he was nailed in place. Standing beside him, I saw nobody was out there, anywhere. The street was silent and dark, except for the blaze illuminating the night sky. On our front lawn, flames jumped off a burning wooden cross, hammered into our lawn near a tree.
‘Good God Almighty,’ I said, a sharp tingle electrifying my spine.
We took in that symbol of hate, scared to go out. Scanning our hundred-foot frontage and then the street, we couldn’t see anybody moving. It was eerie, how still the night was, no neighbor coming outside when a fire crackled on a crucifix. Luther stepped out a few feet, and when no one appeared or spoke, he ran for the garden hose and tried to subdue the flames."
Added January 11, 2025 at 10:19pm
by TA Breese Bentum
Title: Maddox's image
Maddox G
:
City
[Edited]
I think this image aligns because it shows an African American young man in the city when his name is also City. There is a lot of space when the man is at which I think shows that he has a lot more to come. The picture is also focusing on him showing that he is the main character. “An atmospheric illustration of the character City, depicting a blend of diverse emotions and traits. City stands at the crossroads of a bustling yet dreamlike cityscape, embodying multiple identities. The background showcases a dynamic urban setting with soaring skyscrapers contrasted by tranquil, introspective corners brimming with lush greenery. City, a curious and introspective explorer, is portrayed wearing a long, flowing coat that seems to change its colors like a chameleon, symbolizing his fluid identity. His eyes are filled with wonder and contemplation, gazing into the distance, as if searching for the bigger picture within the constant flux of life. Around him, faint whispers of ideas and thoughts appear as ethereal, glowing threads, weaving connections with the people bustling around with liveliness and varied expressions. The scene captures the essence of exploration, emotional depth, and empathy through a balance of vibrant colors and soft shadows, in a semi-realistic style with a slight touch of surrealism.”
Added January 11, 2025 at 10:20pm
by TA Breese Bentum
Title: Rickiyah's image
Rickiyah M
:
My Ai Generated image
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79 comments. The Document Owner has comments hidden at this time.
Design
You did a great job in writing three comments that each provide thoughtful reflections on the text. Each comment is structured with a clear purpose, relating City’s actions and memories to themes of identity and family connections. You maintain a coherent flow in each paragraph, which helps enhance comprehension. However, consider expanding a bit more on some points to reach the 8-10 sentence mark for each comment. This would allow you to explore your ideas more deeply and add more supporting details. Overall, your design demonstrates good organization and purpose.
Score: 8/10
Knowledge
You show a solid understanding of the themes of identity and resilience present in the text. You effectively use evidence from the text to support your analysis, such as mentioning City’s curiosity and the memories tied to his grandparents. However, you could delve deeper into how these themes are developed throughout the story or how they relate to larger societal or personal contexts. Pushing your analysis further could strengthen your discussion of these themes.
Score: 7/10
Application
You apply a variety of analytical skills when discussing the text, especially in drawing connections between City’s experiences and the reader’s own life. You highlight thematic connections to family and personal identity, which are essential aspects of the text. Consider exploring more about how these connections might also relate to broader community or historical contexts, which would add depth to your analysis.
Score: 7/10
Process
You appear to have taken the necessary steps to achieve your analytical goals within the time constraints. You’ve completed all aspects of the task, but there could be more attention to detail, particularly in expanding on and supporting some of your points further. This would ensure a thorough exploration of the text’s themes and enhance your overall analysis.
Score: 7/10
Presentation
Your presentation is clear, and you communicate your main ideas effectively. The language and grammar support the quality of your critique, though a bit more precision in your language choices could elevate the clarity of your analysis. Consider how varying your sentence structure and incorporating more vivid language might make your writing more engaging.
Score: 8/10
Overall Score: 37/50
You’ve demonstrated a strong understanding of the text and its themes. To improve, focus on expanding your analysis and integrating more detailed evidence and connections. This will deepen your insights and enhance the overall impact of your writing. Let me know if you want to dive deeper into any specific area!
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Design
You wrote multiple comments, which is great, but it seems like some of them might be fragmented or incomplete. For example, in the comment about E. Dolores, you seem to stop mid-sentence, which can disrupt the flow and clarity of your analysis. It’s important to structure each comment as a cohesive composition of 8-10 sentences, ensuring that each one has a clear beginning, middle, and end. Consider how you can expand each point to give a fuller picture of your thoughts.
Score: 6/10
Knowledge
Your writing shows an understanding of the themes of identity and resilience, particularly in how you discuss E. Dolores’s experiences at Harvard. You touch on important aspects of societal challenges and personal struggles. However, you could strengthen your analysis by incorporating more direct evidence or quotes from the text to support your points. This would demonstrate a deeper engagement with the material.
Score: 7/10
Application
You make thematic connections between the character’s experiences and broader societal issues, which is a good start. However, try to employ a wider variety of analytical skills and strategies. For instance, consider exploring the historical context or the character’s internal dialogue. This can sharpen your thematic connections and offer a more nuanced understanding of the text.
Score: 7/10
Process
It seems like you have addressed the task to some extent, but there might be areas where more attention to detail could enhance your analysis. For instance, ensuring that each paragraph is complete and fully formed would help in achieving your analytical goals. Consider revisiting your comments to refine and expand them further.
Score: 6/10
Presentation
You communicate your ideas clearly, but there are some grammatical issues and incomplete thoughts that can affect the clarity and quality of your critique. For example, ensuring that sentences are complete and thoughts are fully developed would improve the overall presentation. Pay attention to these details to enhance your writing.
Score: 6/10
Total Score: 32/50
You’ve made a good effort in analyzing the text, and you’re on the right track with connecting themes to broader issues. To improve, focus on structuring your comments more clearly and supporting your ideas with direct evidence from the text. Let me know if you would like more detailed feedback on any specific part!
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Sure, let’s break down the scoring for Tylene’s text based on the five categories: Design, Knowledge, Application, Process, and Presentation.
Design
You structured each comment well, addressing different aspects of the text and connecting them to broader themes. However, some of the comments could be expanded for more depth. For instance, in Excerpt 2, you discuss the importance of community and connection, which is a great start, but providing more specific examples from the text could strengthen your analysis. Overall, your comments are organized and purposeful.
Score: 8/10
Knowledge
You demonstrate a solid understanding of the themes of identity and resilience. By focusing on community, representation, and historical context, you effectively connect the text to these larger themes. However, to enhance your analysis, include more direct evidence or quotes from the text to back up your points. For example, when discussing Howard University, mentioning specific experiences or figures would strengthen your argument.
Score: 7/10
Application
You apply various analytical skills well, especially in connecting textual elements to broader societal issues. Your analysis of community dynamics and cultural representation shows a clear understanding of the themes. To improve, consider exploring more thematic connections, such as how these dynamics affect individual identity or resilience.
Score: 8/10
Process
You’ve completed the task effectively, addressing all aspects of the prompt. Your attention to detail is evident in your analysis, but some areas could be expanded. For instance, providing more context or background information about the text could enhance comprehension for readers who may not be familiar with it.
Score: 8/10
Presentation
Your writing is clear and cohesive, effectively conveying your analysis. The language and grammar support the quality of your critique. However, consider varying your sentence structure to maintain reader engagement. Additionally, incorporating more transitional phrases would improve the flow between ideas.
Score: 8/10
Summary Score: 39/50
Overall, you’ve done a commendable job analyzing the text and connecting it to broader themes. With more direct evidence and expanded analysis, your critique could be even stronger. Would you like guidance on how to incorporate more textual evidence or explore additional thematic connections?
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Design
Your work shows a solid attempt at engaging with both the Improv Teammate and the E. Dolores Johnson Simulator. You initiate conversations with thoughtful statements and questions, encouraging reflection on identity and connections throughout the text. You raise pertinent issues like the complexities of belonging and social justice, making logical connections. For example, your question about how narrative techniques reveal complexities of belonging is a great starting point for discussion. However, ensure to include more open-ended questions to deepen the conversation further. Score: 5/6
Knowledge
You demonstrate a good understanding of the themes of social justice and belonging present in the text. You highlight the significance of cultural symbols like the dashiki and explore the emotional dynamics within family interactions. By reflecting on how the characters navigate identity and belonging, you show a grasp of deeper thematic elements. However, incorporating more direct evidence from the text to support your ideas would strengthen your analysis. Score: 5/6
Application
You effectively engage with the Writing Partner’s responses, expanding on their insights and exploring themes of social justice and belonging. Your ability to discuss character dynamics and identity shows a thoughtful exploration of these topics. However, you could further develop your comments to explore how these themes are reflected in broader societal contexts, which would enrich your discussion. Score: 5/6
Process
You ask open-ended questions that invite further discussion and reflection, which is a strong point in your approach. Your conversation with the Writing Partner unfolds naturally, showing a willingness to delve into complex issues. To improve, consider asking more probing questions that push the discussion deeper into specific events or circumstances in the text. Score: 5/6
Presentation
Your questions and comments effectively communicate your analysis and ideas. Your language and grammar are generally clear and cohesive, supporting the quality of your critique. To enhance clarity, ensure that your questions are concise and directly related to the themes you’re exploring. Score: 5/6
Summary Score
Overall, you have demonstrated a strong ability to engage with the text and your Writing Partner on themes of social justice and belonging. Your thoughtful questions and insights reveal a good understanding of the text’s complexities. With a bit more focus on incorporating direct evidence and pushing the conversation into deeper analysis, you can elevate your textual analysis further. Total Score: 25/30
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Design
You have made a thoughtful attempt to engage with the Writing Partner by posing questions about the complexities of social justice and belonging in the text. However, your interactions could be more structured and purposeful. You have provided some questions and statements, but the exchange could be more coherent and logically connected. Consider starting your conversations with a clear statement or question related to the text to guide the discussion more effectively.
Score: 4/6
Knowledge
Your understanding of the themes of social justice and belonging is evident in your comments, particularly in how you address the challenges faced by marginalized individuals and the representation issues in prestigious institutions. You supported your ideas with evidence from the text, such as highlighting E. Dolores Johnson’s experiences at Harvard. However, you could deepen your analysis by connecting more specific examples from the text to the themes you discuss.
Score: 5/6
Application
You demonstrate a good understanding of the Writing Partner’s responses and engage with them meaningfully. You expand the conversation by exploring the themes of identity and belonging, though there is room for more exploration of these themes in depth. Consider incorporating additional examples from the text and reflecting on how these interactions shape the characters’ experiences.
Score: 5/6
Process
Your questions are open-ended and encourage the Writing Partner to expand and extend the conversation. You engage in a discussion about the text’s issues, but there are opportunities to delve deeper into specific events or circumstances. Aim to have five or more replies with the AI to ensure a well-rounded and thorough conversation.
Score: 4/6
Presentation
Your analysis is communicated clearly, and your main ideas are cohesive. The language and grammar are generally precise, but there are moments where clarity could be improved. For example, ensure that all your questions and statements are directly related to the text and avoid generalizations that could detract from your analysis.
Score: 5/6
Summary Score: 23/30
Overall, you have demonstrated a solid understanding of the themes of social justice and belonging in the text. Your engagement with the Writing Partner is thoughtful, and your analysis is generally clear and well-supported. To improve, focus on structuring your interactions more coherently, exploring themes in greater depth, and ensuring that all your questions are directly connected to the text. Keep up the good work in fostering meaningful discussions!
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Sure, let’s break down Tylene’s text using the five categories for evaluation.
Design
Tylene effectively uses both the Improv Teammate and E. Dolores Johnson Simulator in her writing. She initiates conversations with thoughtful questions about identity, social justice, and belonging, such as when she asks about the deeper layers of understanding in Dolores Johnson’s experience. Tylene’s exchange is purposeful and aims to delve into the complexities of these themes. However, it seems there might not be a full set of five questions or statements prompting the Writing Partner, so there’s room for improvement in expanding the dialogue further.
Score: 4
Knowledge
Tylene demonstrates a solid understanding of the book’s themes of social justice and belonging. She references specific narrative techniques used by Dolores Johnson to convey these themes, such as the amphitheater setting highlighting disparities in representation. While she taps into the broader societal issues, her analysis could benefit from more direct evidence or quotes from the text for stronger support.
Score: 4
Application
Tylene appears to understand the Writing Partner’s responses, engaging thoughtfully with them by reflecting on the implications of Dolores Johnson’s experiences. She connects these to broader themes of identity and resilience. However, her exploration could go deeper into the nuances of these themes through more detailed engagement with the Writing Partner’s responses.
Score: 4
Process
Tylene asks several open-ended questions that encourage further dialogue, showing an eagerness to explore the text’s themes more deeply. She attempts to discuss issues related to identity and belonging, but there might be fewer than five exchanges with the AI, indicating an opportunity for a more in-depth conversation.
Score: 2
Presentation
Tylene communicates her analysis clearly and cohesively, using language effectively to articulate her insights. Her questions are well-formed and show an understanding of the narrative’s complexities. However, ensuring precision and clarity in expressing her main ideas could enhance the overall critique.
Score: 3
Summary Score: 17/30
Tylene has done a commendable job engaging with the text and exploring its themes. To improve, she could expand her dialogue with the Writing Partner further, provide more direct textual evidence, and deepen her exploration of the themes. Keep up the good work, Tylene, and continue to push your analysis further!
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Sure, let’s dive into evaluating Maddox’s image based on the criteria provided.
Design
The image showcases a unique approach with the character standing in a modern urban environment, which may symbolize themes like identity and resilience. The towering skyscraper in the background adds depth and intrigue, suggesting ambition or a journey. The use of light and shadow enhances the mood, making the image stand out. However, more imaginative elements could further provoke thought or enhance understanding of the character’s essence.
Score: 3
Knowledge
The image evokes a sense of solitude and contemplation, aligning with themes of identity. The character’s positioning between the two cars and the upward gaze towards the skyscraper may signify resilience or the pursuit of dreams. The emotional undertones are present but might be made clearer with additional context or expressive details.
Score: 3
Application
The technical execution is proficient, with well-rendered buildings and a realistic portrayal of light and perspective. The choice of colors and composition effectively conveys the urban setting. There is evidence of technical craftsmanship, though finer details could enhance storytelling.
Score: 4
Process
The image reflects an understanding of a modern, possibly futuristic urban context. The setting and elements like the cars and skyscraper suggest an awareness of cultural and situational context. Incorporating more symbols or references could deepen the connection to the character’s story.
Score: 3
Presentation
The image captures attention through its striking composition and use of perspective. There is an invitation for viewers to wonder about the character’s journey and aspirations. However, elements that encourage deeper exploration or interaction could be strengthened.
Score: 3
Summary
Overall, Maddox’s image demonstrates strong technical skills and a thoughtful representation of themes. To enhance the impact, consider adding more imaginative elements and context to deepen the emotional and narrative connections.
Total Score: 16/20
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I can’t identify people in images, but I can help evaluate the image based on the criteria provided.
Design
The image is visually pleasing, with a good balance of natural and architectural elements. However, it doesn’t display particularly innovative or unique approaches to representing the themes of love, resilience, and identity. Consider incorporating more imaginative or unexpected elements to enhance thematic representation.
Score: 3/4
Knowledge
The image does not strongly evoke emotions related to the character’s role or significance in a story. While the setting is serene, it lacks a clear connection to the emotional undertones of love, resilience, and identity. Think about how you might visually represent these themes more explicitly.
Score: 2/4
Application
The technical aspects of the image, such as composition and clarity, are well executed. The use of natural light and the setting contribute to a polished and professional appearance. To improve, you might explore more complex techniques or styles that align with the character’s essence.
Score: 3/4
Process
The image shows a general awareness of situational context, with the academic setting suggesting education or achievement. However, it doesn’t integrate specific cultural or historical references that could enrich its relevance to a particular narrative or theme.
Score: 2/4
Presentation
The image is engaging and captures attention with its bright and inviting atmosphere. However, it could further encourage the audience to explore deeper meanings or provoke reflection on the themes. Adding elements that invite interaction or contemplation would enhance its impact.
Score: 3/4
Overall Score: 13/20
Consider how you might incorporate more thematic and emotional depth into your visual representations. This could involve using symbolism, varied artistic techniques, or more direct connections to the narrative context. How might you adjust the image to better communicate the intended messages about the character and themes?
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